2011

photograph by Luka Yang

2011 is my opportunity to finally advance by choosing either left or right instead of insisting on walking straight when this is not possible.

It is a big puzzle to me how different my perspective at the end of 2009 was, compared to this year. Because, objectively, nothing much happened in 2010 to justify such a big difference. At the end of 2009 I was extremely tired, had few future perspectives and even less energy to implement any measures to change anything. I could even barely come up with a sane resolution for 2010. The end of this year is confusing as ever but at least now I am looking towards 2011 with positive energy and faith in change and finding long lost balance.

But with all my positive attitude towards change this year, one of the biggest of 2011 has imposed itself on me without me having anything to say about it. A certain family issue will force me to go through a major transition in terms of becoming more tolerant, selfless and responsible. It is a huge challenge for someone who has a reputation for being none of the above. But I have a strong feeling that if I don't get it right this time, I might not get another chance. Maybe it'll be my final graduation.

With respect to another issue that has been burdening me, 2011 seems less promising. The battle between old and new has yet to be settled.

snow

photograph by Eden Lee

I have arrived home a few days ago. Finally, it is snowing heavily around here. I am anticipating the sound of a shovel being scraped across the pavement in the morning and that makes me happy. I've heard it other places, but the echo is never quite the same as in the interior yard of our apartment block.

thought of you

It's saturday, it's cartoon day!

Today's cartoon is an old-school 2D style one, by Ryan Woodward, titled "Thought of You". Enjoy:

Thought of You from Ryan J Woodward on Vimeo.

The song is "World Spins Madly On" by The Weepies. Here's a behind the scenes, documenting the collaboration with modern dancers and choreographers.

via @fALk_g

kordan

Kordan from Brooklyn

Kordan: "Mirror" from KORDAN on Vimeo.

via Bloom CN on Facebook

memories

photograph by Angus柒

I miss the mixed smell of leather impregnated with Lucky Strike smoke and intoxicating tusche. I miss the orange lemonade and the white cherry and green nut sweets. I miss listening to Willie Nelson and drinking coke from a coffee mug.

point and shoot

illustration by Luz de Luciernaga

sinnvoll-berlin.de

At the Xmas market in Berlin I have recently bought one of many beautiful notebooks. Each one is hand made and one of a kind. Mine looks like this (both sides shown):

I love the texture of the notebook which was made from old newspaper and thread and the colors that emerge more or less randomly from various old newspaper pictures. The notebook comes from Sinnvoll in Berlin. Do check out their website for more interesting products, all made from recycled products like bicycle tubes, old paper, packages, cans, records etc. Moreover each product comes from a social service project with fair wages. Well done!

compliments

I was so happy to discover this type of street art (?) in my city! It was a piece of paper at the stop lights. It looked like an ordinary announcement, but it was written by hand, in colorful glitter and said: "for free: compliments". Anyone was free to take a compliment with them. And for the ones who didn't, it still made them smile! Great initiative!

re-formatting

photograph by changer

Strong winds make my steps hesitant, the fog renders my way uncertain. For the first time, I feel tempted to give in to a reasonable (what an awful word!) offer. A strong set of old-fashioned values and ideals is threatened, now (finally?).

Reason says go the new way. But my old way is of a brilliance and purity that few will ever have the privilege of knowing. Not one argument against the new way. But my old way is frail and weeping anticipating betrayal. Which way will I turn? Convert? Reformat?

Either way, a storm is ahead.

berlin in winter by night

Below I am sharing some (few) pictures of Berlin by night. It was about the same time in November two years ago, that I visited the city for the first time. And although at that point I had no time to explore the city, I tried to make up for that this year. Unfortunatelly, I had the nastiest cold, was running around with the dizziest and heaviest head I could imagine and was not really in the mood to take pictures, which is why I don't have a big selection and not even enough to show all of Berlin's faces I've seen.

If I were to describe Berlin with three words it would be: relaxed, young, international. And it would still not describe it entirely. It is artsy, modern, funny, alive. Personally, I also recognized some familiar cues, like wide open spaces and boulevards, old-school tall buildings, the subway interior, all of which made me feel comfortable. Last but not least, I love Berlin in winter, in lights, in snow (a little bit) and in the sweet scent of mulled wine and caramelized nuts.

online, offline

photograph by RICENZ

"Jellyfish, are you Spanish?"

"How did you end up in Shanghai?"

"I could swear you were Chinese. Even your picture looks Chinese!"

"How's the weather like in Portugal?"

"I don't know why, but I was sure you were from Hong Kong!"

And it is not just my nationality, my occupation sparks a great deal of dicussion as well. I have to explain my interests, my CV, my choices, and to be honest, I haven't even thought of cool answers for those questions. In one picture and a timelines, people project whatever they want to see. So I realized that Jellyfish only exists for everyone as they want her to be. Because of these expectations, I find it hard to meet up with people offline or chat with them (for example for interviews).

I can't say I am bothered, but I do feel a strange vibe everytime I have to correct/contradict people. It is not what they wanted to hear, this does not fit in the picture they have made of Jellyfish. To some extent maybe they feel tricked. Then I often have to justify and excuse myself. Luckily, most people are very nice and kind, they recover quickly after the first seconds of confusion, are open minded and warm. But I know that from then on, to them I stop being Jellyfish.

nosaj thing

...and some really cool visuals:

Nosaj Thing - MIS, Brasil 2010 (leg. português) from Cauê Ito on Vimeo.

direction long lost

photograph by Lihan Lin

...and going wherever I am taken.

hiromix

Hiromix is a successful female photographer from Japan. Born in 1976 in Tokyo as Toshikawa Hiromi, she was able to establish a name for herslef quite early as one of the most prominent representatives of the private/ introspective and snapshot style. In 1995, her photo diary series, Seventeen Girl Days, won the Canon’s 11th New Cosmos of Photography award.

Recently, I have bought her second photobook (almost identical in concept with "girls blue", which had a much more edgier feel but is now out of print), titled "HIROMIX", which contains random photos of herslef and everyday things, mainly food, flowers, pets, and friends (including actor Hiroyuki Ikeuchi and photographer Takashi Homma with blonde hair).

"Photography is the place where I can express all of what I feel and think in my everyday life. It would not be understood by grown-ups or kids - only we can see what it is. So, I don't expect everyone to understand it. It just makes me so happy when it reaches people, even a few."

For more on Hirmoix link here or here. For an interview link here. Photo source.

the goddess of 1967

I have recently watched the indie Australian roadmovie "The Goddess of 1967" (2000), the title of which refers to a car. That's right, a car. But it's not any car, it's the so-called goddess which is English for the French word déesse = DS = Citroen DS (nice play of words ;-).

The movie starts with a mysterious and eccentric Japanese buyer who flies to Australia to pick up the goddess, he had purchased online. This adventure is the context for following the car's and its owner's history back several generations. The main character of the movie is the actual car owner, a blind young woman, with a more than difficult past that will have to be explored.

I am not quite content with the directing by Macau-born Clara Law and husband Eddie Fong. The slow pace of the movie is not balanced and makes it seem draggy. Moreover some issues seem to be left unfinished, some choices unexplained, some scenes superfluous, some characters (like the Japanese man, or the young woman's mother) don't seem to develop and the flashbacks segment the narrative in an unfavourable way.

Nevertheless, the movie's strong points are amazing and make me recommend the movie without hesitation: the amazing cinematography (exquisite frame composition, beautiful colors), the strangeness/bizarreness (at least to me, reminiscent of Arizona Dream), the serious, almost distressing themes (death, coming of age, child abuse, revenge etc.), the focus on the female universe (even the car is a feminine entity) and the brilliant(!) performance by Rose Byrne.

Watch a "behind the scenes" documentary about the movie here: part1, part2, part3

I watched it since it was suggested by Scott in a comment to a post by Danica on Kitsune Noir and I loved the trailer (music: Walk Don't Run 64 by The Ventures), which is why I am sharing it here as well:

moonassi

Daehyun Kim, aka moonassi was born in 1980, has studied traditional Korean painting at the College of Fine Arts, Hong-Ik University and lives and works in Seoul, Korea. He is working at "Lomography Korea" as a designer and likes to write poems, as well. I have been instantly mesmerized by his illustration artwork, I somehow feel they are simple, yet elegant, extremely clever and also relevant to myself. I am sharing a couple of them below, although I strongly advise you to visit his website for more:

Moonassi's black and white illustrations usually depict two identical characters engaged in what at first glance appear to be strange interactions. Some times one of the two characters is layered, broken into pieces or has tiny replicas of himself emerging from his body. It really takes a closer look at all the ingenious details to be able to understand the relationship between the characters and decide on its significance.

"I'm anyone or anything anywhere", says moonassi and by this he points out at the universal character of his theme. The artist's statement also underlines the anonymity of the individuals in his illustrations, which potentially mirror the viewer's own thoughts and emotions.

I am not sure whether this was the intention of the artist, but to me, moonassi's consistently identical figures represent an individual and his alter egoes. I think one of the major themes in his work is the duality (and multi-layer-character) of a person's self-concept.

dust kid

It's saturday morning, it's cartoon morning!

Today I want to share a Korean animation by Yumi Jung: "Munjiai" aka "Dust Kid" (2009). It tells the story of a young woman who wakes up in the middle of the night and starts tidying up her apartment. In this small nocturnal universe, her only co-inhabitants are small versions of herself that she finds hidden in every dusty corner of her room, always naked, sad, maybe frightened, ashamed. These dust kids, appear consistently and suddenly and are in some way reminders of her own true self, that she tries so hard to hide in the comfort and predictability of routine. But are not welcome, they are uncomfortable intruders and the young woman tries to crush them, flush them away, drown them, throw them away.

Highlights of this animation are the incredibly minimalistic pencil drawings, the wonderful use of sounds (the slippers, the moving of objects on the table, the buzzing of the fridge), that enhance the feeling of loneliness and the fact that it opens up for reflection.

Tokyo International Anime Fair 2010 [2]
Hochgeladen von lever-de-soleil. - Entdecke mehr kreative Videos.

via Ma Kuangpei on Facebook

Note: A kind commenter has pointed out that the animation actually says Seoul International Animation Festival not Tokyo International Anime Fair, as suggested by the video description. I don't speak either Japanese or Korean, so I can't verify that. I do know however that the animation was present at the Tokyo International Anime Fair 2010, as well as a number of other international festivals. I also realize that at the beginning of the video it says that it is supported by the Seoul Animation Center /Seoul Business Agency. If anyone can clarify this, please leave a comment.

burnout

Note: Sorry, it's one of those finds, the author of which remains a mystery to me. If you know him/her, drop me a line and I will credit.

two

French dancer Sylvie Guillem in one of the four parts of the fascinating "Push" ("Two", "Solo", "Shift", "Push").

outside

I have recently watched a wonderful 15-minute documentary about Beijing and aspects of the life of its people, titled "Outside". The director, Sérgio Cruz, explains:

"In China, culture and the arts are very closely linked to people and their lives. The street life in Beijing is a 24-hour live show full of music, dance and sports. Over a period of month residence time (September 2007), I was observing Chinese life, collecting 'road images', documenting quotidian performances (...)"

But this beautiful piece of film, that portrays the fast-paced and busy life in the noisy and continually changing city, paradoxically manages to achieve a wonderful, tranquil effect by avoiding speech, creating beautiful transitions and using an overall slow pacing.

In my view, the film doesn not necessarily focus on the city itself or people's actions (be they dancing, performing or excercising) but rather on the context of these. And he manages to give the Western eye a glimpse of the interdependency and -connectedness of people in a collectivistic cultural frame.

View this movie at cultureunplugged.com

we are postrock

Via We like that I came across a wonderful website, titled We are postrock, the purpose of which is explained in the following:

"Our purpose in this is to subjectify ourselves in the music and visualize imagery for the postrock community. We genuinely believe that perhaps the really provocative area for future musical development lies in postrock.

We record and produce these HD concerts because we want to capture the closest thing to what it’s like being at a live postrock/instrumental show - doing it all for the love and passion we have for postrock music and all its bands."

Here I want to share two videos.

The first one is "Black Dunes" by This Will Destroy You, where the beautiful music is matched by the stunning visuals of the video.

"This Will Destroy You are an instrumental quartet from the great state of Texas who play a cascading brand of cinematic rock music. Often compared and linked to purveyors of the “post-rock” sub-genre, the band has managed to transcend the tag and carve its own niche via a delicate and balancing infusion of electronics, strings, and an array of unconventional “rock” instrumentation over bombastic and receding harmony."

I was happy to see that they also feature Mono, one of my favourite bands. "Battle to Heaven" is like an epic tale, so powerful that it's almost kinetic:

"The band’s style of instrumental rock music is influenced by the genres of experimental rock and shoegazing, as well as by both the classical and contemporary classical periods of classical music, and also by noise and minimalism. We found that their musical structure reflect classical compositions & movements intertwined in a meditative narrative progression."

PRIVATE issue 50

PRIVATE International Review of Photographs has released its 50th issue, titled: "China, True or Real?" I have already received a copy and have to say that it is now one of my favourite photobooks. It features the likes of Muge, Zhang Xiao and my favourite, Yanming.

"In contemporary China, uncertainty about what is “true” and what is “false”, “reality” and “appearance”, extends from the realm of photography to that of existence itself. We often feel that we are confronted with such an illusory, ambiguous, unexpected “reality” as to lead us to doubt not just our perceptions, but our very capacity for interpretation.

[...] Perhaps the act of capturing and confining – if by means of a fictitious, illusory medium such as photography – some aspect of their surrounding environment constitutes a starting point from which Chinese photographers may consider it afresh, in more subjective, less commonplace terms, thus inventing it anew."

beetle queen conquers tokyo

Beetle Queen Conquers Tokyo is a documentary about the fascination some Japanese have with insects. via Kitsune Noir

"Working backwards through history, Beetle Queen Conquers Tokyo explores the mysterious development of Japan’s age-old love affair with bugs. Using insects like an anthropologist’s toolkit, the film uncovers Japanese philosophies that will shift Westerners’ perspectives on nature, beauty, life, and even the seemingly mundane realities of their day-to-day routines."

music

RT @reese: the right music fights the demons. electrically surges the soul. gets the proverbial ass moving. makes dreams happen.

up the yangtze

"Up the Yangtze" is a documentary film by Yung Chang, a young Chinese-Canadian director. The movie is about life in modern China in the Yangtze area. It mainly follows two characters, as they begin to work on board of a luxury cruise ship: a young, 16-year old girl, who comes from a modest family in a rural area and a young boy from a middle-class urban environment.

There are scenes that move the viewer by their cinematographic beauty, others are powerful due to the authenticity of the performances (my favrouites were: the prayer of the old lady, the father carrying the heavy closet up the hill, the young girl trying to proudly hold back her tears when her parents visit her on the ship). The luxury cruise ships were an opportunity for people to say goodbye to it, as it was slowly dissapearing as a consequence of the construction of the Three Gorges dam.

The Yangtze area has been subjected to immense change over the last years, due to the controversial Three Gorges dam project, the largest hydroelectric dam in the world. Its construction was not only extremely expensive, but it was aggressive and its necessity has been contested by many. The finalization of the project involved large transformations of the area, destruction and the relocation of over 2 million people.

To learn more about the film maker's inspiration, read this Q&A and/or watch this short interview.

Watch the trailer here:

I also recommend:

• having a look at Muge's photography, as he tried to document the changes along the Yangtze due to the dam project;
• reading "River Town", by Peter Hessler, who in 1996 had spent 2 years in Fuling, a small town on the Yangtze, and worked as an English Literature teacher. He delivers an extremely enjoyable and genuine portrait of the people and land of the famous Three Gorges area.

hana

Wonderful hipnotic experimental music piece by Asa Chang and Junray. It's like a mix of oriental and cyber sounds. This really has the power to transfer one temporarily to a dream world. Enjoy!

via David Valentim on Facebook

of mothers and sons

She's always been an airheaded lady but quite adorable in her own way. She never stayed long for a visit, after all, time was short and she had a dozen small things to take care of. Never tiring she ran around all day, like a whirlwind, carrying bags from here to there, her hair in a mess, her coat tied at the wrong buttons.

With age she became increasingly dependent. And forgetful, but considering her characteristic fuzziness, that never seemed particularly peculiar. She misplaced things and failed to find them, she needed help with transportation, fixing things around the house. She started calling several times a day sharing the same story over and over again. When confronted with her own disorientation, she remained annoyingly stubborn, refusing to admit her own weakness. And when she was exposed, she always covered it with an indulgent smile.

Today she failed the clock test. It shouldn't matter anymore whether she is strategically faking or not. It shouldn't matter that the tone of her voice sounds like that of a spoilt child. It shouldn't matter that you have to check up on her several times a day, that she embarasses you in public, that you have to pay for her medicine and mend her mistakes. It doesn't matter whether, considering your common history, she deserves your loyalty or not. Does it?

photo by Yuan Xiaopeng

related posts: Maira Kalman & Phillip Toledano's "Days With My Father"

dream of pink and a bit of blue

I fell in love with this shot by Chinese photographer Seatory: the pose, the pink of the room, the dress and the curtain, and even the blue of the mask has a correspondent in the tiny hair tie. My favourite however are the blueish and pinkish color reflections in the hair...superb!

all the way to china - then i would stop

via Ricky So

your duty

RT @reese: "You have a duty to your potential as a human being. The world craves what you have to offer it."

I really love the first part of this statement. It has (at least to me) a strong motivational quality. Anything else would be irresponsibly making a mock of yourself, it would irreversibly lead to old age filled with bitterness and regret.

But I disagree with the second part of the tweet. Frankly, the world doesn't give a s***. The only person you have to impress, you have to like, love, to come to terms with is you yourself. What "the world" may or may not do does not lie in your power and is therefore irrelevant.

Never do anything because anybody wants or expects you to. But it IS your resonsibility to yourself to try your best in everything you are doing now.

my new medicine

On such a beautiful sunday I will share my newest medicine below. The post was orginally published on KoiKoiKoi, where I have written more details about the video.

The beautiful short film is titled "Dear Japan", was shot with a handheld Canon EOS 7D by Nathan Miller and brilliantly edited by Matthew Brown using the track "Empty Room Trailer Version" by Zack Hemsey.

What I especially like about it is that it feels like a dream, a memory or a flashback that looks familiar enough to belong to any of us. I have to say it diminishes my itchy feet to finally visit the country and my longing for that culture, so I am re-watching it regularly. Especially refreshing is that it does not use any stereotypical representation of Japan, and if it does, it comes across very subtly (I don't remember seeing one kimono/maiko in there!).

Enjoy the wonderful imagery, the impecable sound and the fast-paced but perfectly-timed editing of Matthew's "Dear Japan":

why do i work the way i work?

Today was a terribly good day: I worked with few distractions, managed to be productive and am very content of the result. Let's hope tomorrow (maybe the next month?) will be the same!

The problem is, you see, I am working to introduce an intern to some analyses we are doing. Not only is it unrelated to my actual work, but it's also rather voluntary. And yet, I am compiling information, running analyses and writing a tutorial so I can be best prepared on monday and help the poor fella understand something which took me years to grasp. And it did not take me so long to understand it, because it was too difficult. Rather, it's something I ignored for a long time, because there has always been a way around it. In fact, for years now, people have been programming scripts to run these analyses automatically and as long as you have the skills or know someone who can write one for you, there is no reason to invest that much time in understanding the mechanics behind it (after all there are tons of other relevant stuff to do).

So, in the end, the tutorial I have written will never be of any use to anyone. Maybe only for demonstration purposes for interns? But whenever the interns will actually start analyzing, they will use the automatized script files.

I think this attitude of mine that became evident during the last few days pretty much explains a lot of things in my life. No, I'm not excessiveley kind or diligent or anything. I just seem to be doing small things for the sake of getting them done. I am certain it's not productive on the long run, but something deep inside me tells me "you did a good job". Maybe it's just a way of deceiving myself. Or maybe not. Maybe that's what actually matters to me. We are our sole constant companions and in the end, when we are old, it is still ourselves that we will be stuck with.

photo by ppimm

Update: 23.10.2013
Years later, interns and students still come to me and thank me for my tutorials. Thank you time, for proving my point ;) 

between bears

It's saturday morning, it's cartoon morning!

This week's cartoon has a somewhat difficult to grasp, abstract concept but is technically and visually stunning. It is Eran Hilleli's graduation film at Bezalel Academy of Art and Design and was created using a mix of 2d and 3d (Maya and After Effects). The music was composed especially for the animation short by Ori Avni and performed by Ori Avni and Daniela Spector.

I especially like the paper-art feeling and the sounds in the video, I have to admit however that I was left puzzled with respect to its meaning and I think that grasping the idea behind the animation would increase its effect on the viewer. The only hint the author gives is equally puzzling: "...a debt to my childhood and other lives I hope I lived. Inspired by words of songs I admire". Nevertheless, it's a great piece and I am sharing it below.

baths - lovely bloodflow

The video below was recently released for Baths' "Lovely Bloodflow" (directed by Alex Takacs and Joe Nanikn of Young Replicant) and I recommend it for its cinematic beauty. It depicts the last minutes in the life of an injured samurai, whose dying moments are prolonged by two fascinating spirits of the forest (yokai), who take him to meet the main forest spirit. This one will finally put an end to his agony in exchange of his soul.

via Nerdcore via Stereogum

andymori

Andymori are a young Japanese band, whose songs always manage to cheer me up. I especially like their incredible energy. One of my favourites however is "1984", which is slower, but equally enjoyable.

1984

Follow Me (live)

Everything is My Guitar

青い空

chemical brothers - another world

what's the meaning of life?

Find out more answers on Rachel Mawdsley's Behance gallery, where she asked about the meaning of life and photographed funeral directors and midwives.

the journey

The anticipation of two wonderful weeks in the U.S. catapults my work motivation on levels so high, I never thought they existed!

It will be my first time in the U.S.: a real adventure. More than anything, it's an opportunity to meet new people and allow myself to be permeated by their ideas and enthusiasm. There is no greater energy for me than that of other people. It will also be a time where I'll work on the project closest to my interest.

And it's the promise of a turning point in my way of thinking, an opportunity to perceive life differently. What will happen after I return? Will I have recovered my confidence in myself and the passion to keep me motivated? Will I come back less resentful, more understanding and at peace?

It almost feels like planning one of those spiritual journeys, where one undergoes purification and returns completely changed. Haha, it's actually nothing like that, and it involves intensive work and developing group dynamics. But most importantly, it's two weeks devoid of any of the harmful factors that usually consume and influence me on a regular basis. It's a blank new piece of paper for my own self to express itself on neutral grounds.

I wonder what I'll feel like when I am going to read this post after I return. May my hopes and expectations be fulfilled.

photos by Aegea

bodkin

via the wonderful blog I'm revolting I came across a post on an amazingly beautiful design label. I immediately fell in love with Bodkin's 2010 fall/winter collection. The colors, the clean architectural lines, the photgraphs by Tina Tyrell...

moderat - rusty nails

Moderat are an indie electronic band based in Berlin. I discovered their music via the newest "Pictoplasma - Characters in Motion" trailer. But what actually really left me in awe was this brilliant mesmerizing video by the Pfadfinderei studio for their track "Rusty Nails". The motion and shapes are so dreamlike, I feel like watching it over and over again.

I loved the part, where the human body is wrapped like a cocoon. The following parts: the wind-blown silk and the uncovering of the bodies are great. But my favourite section of the video comes at the end, where the dynamic layers of the fabric are staged by fantastic body postures and jumps. Enjoy:

Moderat "Rusty Nails" from Pfadfinderei on Vimeo.

goni montes

I've just found this illustration by Goni Montes featuring a bloom of beautiful sea jellies.

found via KoiKoiKoi